Quandary
by ncfan
Summary: Jiraiya isn't sure what Minato had in mind.


Right, I spent a couple of days at a house with no Internet access, and I had a lot (and I mean, a _lot_) of spare time on my hands, so I used the time to whip up several Naruto oneshots. Seventeen, to be exact. So, for anyone with me on their author alert, if you're wondering why your e-mail is getting swamped right about now, that's why.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

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Konoha after the Kyuubi's attack is a gutted ruin. Jiraiya steps over pieces of wooden rubble, drinking in the bitter brew of silence with grim acceptance.

The Hokage's tower and the faces on the mountain are the only things in the north of the village still standing; it was the first thing Jiraiya saw when got back into the village.

All the while as he walks through the ruined village, Jiraiya can feel eyes following him, even when there is no one in sight.

He knows Minato is dead. All Jiraiya has heard is that Minato died sealing the Kyuubi into a host, and the only reason Jiraiya's come back is to check on Kushina and see if the baby's been born yet. Dull grief for his student's death heavies Jiraiya's footsteps as he picks his way to the tower.

And only more ill news awaits Jiraiya from his old sensei's mouth.

"He sealed that thing inside his own son?" Jiraiya asks incredulously, gaping at Sarutobi.

The old man nods miserably. "Minato wanted Naruto to be remembered as a hero. But since none of the village knows that Naruto is his son, no one else is willing to see it that way."

Jiraiya grimaces. "How bad is it?"

"Half of the council wants him put to death, and the other half would prefer to see him turned into a living weapon."

"Where's the kid now?"

"Kakashi-chan is taking care of him."

…_Person or weapon? …_

Even in the alien landscape that Konoha has become, Jiraiya can still find the way to Kakashi's small apartment. The boy is clearly falling apart at the seams, no matter how much he tries to hide it. His uncovered eye is noticeably bloodshot and his face pale and drawn.

It takes Jiraiya a great deal of wheedling, cajoling and outright threats to get Kakashi to let go of Naruto for even a few minutes, while the boy goes into the kitchen to warm up some milk for the baby.

Kakashi may not be able to forget his grief, but Jiraiya is too wrapped up in the present quandary occupying his mind to give as much thought to his grief as before.

_Person, or weapon?_

Jiraiya sighs wearily as he stares down at the sleeping baby in his arms, tracing the coal-black whisker marks on his face; they seem like birthmarks, but feel like scars, slightly raised from the skin. A sign of the Kyuubi's influence.

_Well, Minato, you've left a real mess behind you. You should have been more specific; humans and weapons both can be heroes._

_Shinobi are human weapons, no matter how much you might think otherwise and the first jinchūriki was created for the express purpose of being the ultimate protector of his village, but the things people like Danzo would do to Naruto I wouldn't wish on anyone. If Naruto becomes a protector of Konoha, he'll be the protector nobody wants._

_I can't look after the kid; I can't protect him. And I don't think the mightier-than-thou council is going to let Kakashi take care of him for much longer. Oh, Minato, why did you have to do this to your own son?_

Jiraiya closes his eyes, wishing Minato were still alive. He would be able to take care of anything and everything. And if Kushina had survived the birth, then there at least would have been someone to vouch for and consistently protect Naruto. Now, there is nothing but the Hokage's will standing between Naruto's small body and the assassin's kunai.

Jiraiya knows he could take Naruto out of the village if he wanted to, but if he tried that there would be a thousand objections, and Jiraiya's just not quite belligerent enough—or stupid enough—to go up against the will of the council. Not to mention that the open road is no place for a child, and Jiraiya has no intention of staying in Konoha.

The life of Konoha's infant savior may well become a living hell, and there's nothing Jiraiya can or is willing to do about it. It makes Jiraiya sick to know that he's abandoning Naruto to his fate out of pure selfishness.

It's hard not to be angry at Minato for the unholy mess he's left behind, for dying on the village when the village needed him so badly. But Minato, Jiraiya knows, has always had a devotion to the village bordering on a martyr complex, and nothing would have been able to dissuade Minato from the course of action he took a week ago if he had been damn well determined to do it.

But Jiraiya's still angry. Minato wasn't explicit with what he had in mind and because of it Naruto's life is hanging in the balance. Minato left his one and only child in the lurch, and left everyone mourning him filled with a resounding question.

Later, Jiraiya goes to the cenotaph, and despite his lingering anger he is glad to see that Minato's name has been carved into the stone.

The day is overcast and gray, orange sparks of the Kyuubi's chakra still making what few trees are left in the north end of Konoha glitter with poisonous chakra.

The people of the village have eyes that have seen hell on earth and are in a way still living in hell, because their minds are consigned to the flames and they will never be able to forget when the Devil came to Konoha.

Jiraiya can, from a more detached perspective, understand why they might want Naruto dead, but it doesn't stop him from hating every single person who has ever wanted to see the child die.

And Jiraiya knows he will never be able to know what his student had in mind when he sealed the Kyuubi no Kitsune into the body of his infant son.

Jiraiya kneels and traces the name with his fingers across cool smooth stone.

_Namikaze Minato, Yondaime Hokage_

"Damn it, Minato," Jiraiya whispers, caught somewhere between the twin influences of anger and grief.

_Did you want him treated as a human or a weapon?_


End file.
